Voice of the White House

In recent past issues, we have carried comments from a reporter assigned to the White House press corps. Some of these remarks, most especially one about Bush’s physical and mental problems, drew an enormous number of viewers and hundreds of inquiries, most especially from foreign press entities. The reporter advised us by email that there was rampant fury in the White House and security was becoming very tight. As a result of this, he decided to lay low for a few weeks and see how the wind was blowing. Yesterday, he sent us the following material which we are now posting. Some of it is outrageous in the extreme but to date, no one has proven him wrong. Our source was the first to expose and we were the first to make public, the accusations that the President of the United States was a man that suffered from serious psychological problems. Since our initial publication of what we call the Madness of King George, there has been increasing interest in the subject and herewith, we present additional input from both inside and outside the White House. [We are not responsible for the views of the writer. Ed.]

(June 24, 2004) I have been sending out all sorts of interesting material from inside the Monkey Palace to just about everyone. As you are the only ones, so far, who have been publishing it and citing me (others are publishing but not citing) here are some really interesting stories for your readers to chew on. First off, the Moore flick is causing spastic colon inside the Monkey Palace. They have dragged out all kinds of poor souls with a desire to suck the Imperial bum to trash the film but it isn’t going to do any good. And some comments about the President: You speak about King George when referring to Bush. Queen George might be more to the point. Yes, our beloved leader has certain social problems that would not endear him to the Christian Right if they knew. When he was at Yale, Georgie hung out with drag queens when he wasn’t getting shit faced at the frat house! And this didn’t stop once he left Yale and went to Texas to copycat his dear old dad, the military pilot. George likes to prance on the wild side when no one is looking but you can’t hide that sort of thing for too long. Oh yes, his top aides know all about his “close friendships”, especially with the black drag queen, but talk about it around here you dare not do. He keeps that part of his life away from here, believe me, but most of his top people know about it. One of his very top aides got into a bit of trouble years back at a Church Retreat where he gave some sweet and very young thing some booze and little pills to disinhibit her and was playing CPR with her when someone walked in. That cost our non-hero, a Bush stalwart, a lot of money. The Bush family know all about this but no one else does. If the born-again wierdos knew about this, they never would have voted en bloc for Curious George. They would probably stone him but then, let’s face it, George has been stoned before, many, many times! He’s given up coke, pot, booze and probably drag queens because God doesn’t approve of such things (neither would the voters in Iowa) and he is certain he will be reelected. Once, we were permitted to bring our families to the White House for a social function but my wife, who knows what I do, refused to come and would certainly not bring our young son. He might get Jesus n one ear and a hot tongue in the other. Sick, sick, sick.